Laughter is the best medicine. So start your day with funny inspiration quotes, and nobody will be able to stop you! These funny, encouraging quotes are apt for life, love, work, students, employees, and more to tickle your funny bone and make you laugh.
Funny Inspirational Quotes About Life
A collection of funny inspirational quotes about life.
- “If you don’t design your own life plan, chances are you’ll fall into someone else’s plan. And guess what they have planned for you? Not much.”
- “If you end up with a boring, miserable life because you listened to your mom, your dad, your teacher, your priest, or some guy on television telling you how to do your shit, then you deserve it.” – Frank Zappa
- “If we’re not meant to have midnight snacks, why is there a light in the fridge?”
- “Life is hard; it’s harder if you’re stupid.” – John Wayne
- “I want to be like a caterpillar. Eat a lot. Sleep for a while. Wake up beautiful.”
- “Too much of a good thing can be wonderful.” – Mae West
- “Dear life, when I said: ‘Can my day get any worse?’ It was rhetorical, not a challenge.”
- “Change is not a four letter word… but often your reaction to it is!” – Jeffrey Gitomer
- “Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds.” – Albert Einstein
- “It amazes me how much exercise and extra fires sound alike.”
- “When life gives you lemons, squirt someone in the eye.” – Cathy Guisewite
- “In my defense, I was left unsupervised.”
- “Anxiety is like a toddler. It never stops talking. Tells you you’re wrong about everything. Wakes you up at 3 am.”
- “The more you weigh, the harder you are to kidnap. Stay safe. Eat cake.”
- “Try to be like the turtle – at ease in your own shell.” – Bill Copeland
- “I walk around like everything is fine. But deep down, inside my show, my sock is sliding off.”
- “If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?” – George Carlin
- “I think my guardian angel drinks.”
- “A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.” – Steve Martin
- “Taking naps sounds so childish. I prefer to call them horizontal life pauses.”
- “My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. So far I’ve finished two bags of M&Ms and a chocolate cake. I feel better already.” – Dave Barry
- “Never let anyone treat you like a yellow starburst. You are a pink starburst.”
- “Respect your parents. They passed school without Google.”
- “Edison failed 10, 000 times before he made the electric light. Do not be discouraged if you fail a few times.” -Napoleon Hill
- “If at first you don’t succeed, then skydiving definitely isn’t for you.” – Steven Wright
- “People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing – that’s why we recommend it daily.” –Zig Ziglar
- “Good things come to those who wait… greater things come to those who get off their ass and do anything to make it happen.”
- “You can live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that make you want to live to be a hundred.” – Woody Allen
- “Whatever you do, always give 100%. Unless you’re donating blood.” – Bill Murray
- “You can’t wait for inspiration. You have to go after it with a club.” – Jack London
- “Opportunity does not knock, it presents itself when you beat down the door.” – Kyle Chandler
- “Failure is the condiment that gives success its flavor.” – Truman Capote
- “You’re only given a little spark of madness. You mustn’t lose it.” – Robin Williams
- “Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings.” – Robert Bloch
- “When life puts you in a tough situation, don’t say ‘Why me?’, say ‘Try me’.”
- “Never let your sense of morals prevent you from doing what is right.” – Isaac Asimov
- “If you’re going to be thinking, you may as well think big.” – Donald Trump
- “I intend to live forever. So far, so good.” – Steven Wright
- “If you’re going to be able to look back on something and laugh about it, you might as well laugh about it now.” -Marie Osmond
- “Don’t worry about the world coming to an end today. It’s already tomorrow in Australia.” – Charles Schulz
- “Life is like a sewer… what you get out of it depends on what you put into it.” – Tom Lehrer
- “Cinderella proves that a new pair of shoes can change your life.”
- “Life is too short to be serious all the time. So, if you can’t laugh at yourself, call me…I’ll laugh at you.”
- “Most people miss opportunity because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.” – Thomas Edison
- “Here is a test to find whether your mission on earth is finished: If you’re alive it isn’t.” – Richard Bach
- “People who wonder whether the glass is half empty or half full are missing the point. The glass is refillable.”
- “Well-behaved women seldom make history.” – Laurel Thatcher Ulrich
- “Life always offers you a second chance, it’s called tomorrow.”
- “Consider the postage stamp: its usefulness consists in the ability to stick to one thing ’til it gets there.” – Josh Billings
- “When I hear somebody sigh, ‘Life is hard,’ I am always tempted to ask, ‘Compared to what?’” – Sydney Harris
Funny Inspirational Quotes For Work
These hilarious quotes and posters will surely inspire you to go to your workplace with a smile and push you through the day with amazing humor mood. And if its the weekend or your workout session you will surely find the encouragement to hit the gym, or work and achieve your dreams.
- “If you don’t know where you are going, you might wind up someplace else.” – Yogi Berra
- “It is bad to suppress laughter. It goes back down and spreads to your hips.” – Fred Allen
- “Sometimes the best part of my job is that my chair swivels.”
- “There never was a child so lovely but his mother was glad to get him asleep.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson
- “All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence, and then success is sure.” – Mark Twain
- “I have a simple philosophy: Fill what’s empty. Empty what’s full. Scratch where it itches.” – Alice Roosevelt Longworth
- “So it turns out that being an adult is really just Googling how to do stuff.”
- “It took me fifteen years to discover I had no talent for writing, but I couldn’t give it up because by then I was too famous.” – Robert Benchley
- “Honest criticism is hard to take, particularly from a relative, a friend, an acquaintance, or a stranger.” – Franklin P. Jones
- “Why is Monday so far from Friday and Friday so near to Monday?”
- “You must pay for your sins. If you have already paid, please ignore this notice.” — Sam Levenson
- “Follow your passion, stay true to yourself, never follow someone else’s path unless you’re in the woods and you’re lost and you see a path then by all means you should follow that.” – Ellen Degeneres
- “Luck is what you have left over after you give 100 percent.” – Langston Coleman
- “Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.” – Mark Twain
- “Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please.” – Mark Twain
- “Money won’t make you happy…but everybody wants to find out for themselves.” – Zig Ziglar
- “Cleaning up is just putting stuff in less obvious places.”
- “I am blessed with a funny gene that makes me enjoy life.”
- “You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself any direction you choose. You’re on your own. And you know what you know. And YOU are the one who’ll decide where to go.” – Dr. Seuss
- “I have to be successful because I like expensive things.” — Lisa Lieberman-Wang
- “Hating people is like burning down your own home to get rid of a rat.” — Harry Emerson Fosdick
- “Not all storms come to disrupt your life. Some come to clear your path….”
- “Listen, smile, agree, and then do whatever you were gonna do anyway.” – Robert Downey Jr.
- “The best way to appreciate your job is to imagine yourself without one.” – Oscar Wilde
- “Life has a funny way of working out. Just when you start to believe it never will.”
- “Do or do not. There is no try.”
- “If at first you don’t succeed, then skydiving definitely isn’t for you.” – Steven Wright
- “You must learn from the mistakes of others. You can’t possibly live long enough to make them all yourself.” – Sam Levenson
- “The best insurance policy for tomorrow is to make the most productive use of today.”
- “Stop doubting yourself, work hard and make it happen!”
- “If you fall, I’ll always be there. – The Floor”
- “I find television very educational. Every time someone turns it on, I go in the other room and read a book.” – Groucho Marx
- “First five days after weekend are the hardest.”
- “Be like a postage stamp. Stick to a thing till you get there.” – Josh Billings
- “People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day.” – A.A. Milne
- “Sometimes I spend the whole meeting wondering how they got the big meeting table through the door.”
- “I’m bored is a useless thing to say. I mean, you live in a great, big, vast world that you’ve seen none percent of. Even the inside of your own mind is endless; it goes on forever, inwardly, do you understand? The fact that you’re alive is amazing, so you don’t get to say ‘I’m bored.”- Louis C.K.
- “It’s okay to look at the past and the future. Just don’t stare.” — Lisa Lieberman-Wang
- “Whoever said, ‘It’s not whether you win or lose that counts,’ probably lost.” – Martina Navratilova
- “Focus, focus, focus! What am I, a telescope?!” – Naruto Uzumaki
- “If the plan doesn’t work change the plan. But never the goal.”
- “I don’t think there will be enough coffee or middle fingers for this Monday.”
- “I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should have been more specific.” – Lily Tomlin
- “Teamwork means never having to take all the blame yourself.”
- “Even if you are on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there.” – Will Rogers
- “His insomnia was so bad that he could not sleep during office hours.” – Arthur Baer
- “By working faithfully eight hours a day you may eventually get to be boss and work twelve hours a day.” – Robert Frost
- “Even a stopped clock is right twice every day. After some years, it can boast of a long series of successes.” – Marie von Ebner-Eschenbach
- “I couldn’t repair your brakes so I made your horn louder.”
- “Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive.” – Elbert Hubbard
Short Funny Inspirational Quotes
- “When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water.”
- “Work until your bank account looks like a phone number.”
- “A clear conscience is a sure sign of a bad memory.” – Mark Twain
- “Think like a proton. Always positive.”
- “A diamond is merely a lump of coal that did well under pressure.”
- “The road to success is dotted with many tempting parking spaces.” – Will Rogers
- “If the world didn’t suck we’d all fly into space.”
- “When I’m sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead.” – Barney Stinson
- “I am so clever that sometimes I don’t understand a single word of what I am saying.” – Oscar Wilde
- “Life is a blank canvass, and you need to throw all the paint on it you can.” – Danny Kaye
- “Leadership is the art of getting someone else to do something you want done because he wants to do it.” – Dwight D. Eisenhower
- “The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.” – Terry Pratchett
- “Every tattoo is temporary, because we’re all slowly dying.”
- “There are no traffic jams along the extra mile.” – Roger Staubach
- “Life is like photography. You need the negatives to develop.”
- “It could be that your purpose in life is to serve as a warning to others.” – Ashleigh Brilliant
- “If you think you are too small to make a difference, try sleeping with a mosquito.” – Dalai Lama
- “I used to think I was indecisive, but now I’m not so sure.”
- “Nothing is impossible, the word itself says “I’m possible!” – Audrey Hepburn
- “I didn’t fail the test. I just found 100 ways to do it wrong.” – Benjamin Franklin
- “Dreams are like rainbows. Only idiots chase them.”
- “Cupcakes are muffins that believed in miracles.”
- “Bad decisions make good stories.” – Ellis Vidler
- “You can’t have everything. Where would you put it?” – Steven Wright
- “I am an early bird and a night owl… so I am wise and I have worms.” – Michael Scott
- “Happiness is just sadness that hasn’t happened yet.”
- “Always remember that you are unique – just like everybody else.”
- “Life is a shipwreck but we must not forget to sing in the lifeboats.” -Voltaire
- “There’s never enough time to do all the nothing you want.” – Bill Watterson
- “Be happy – it drives people crazy.”
Funny Motivational Quotes
No one can ever laugh too much, and these funny quotes will surely encourage you to smile bigger and laugh harder with a pinch of motivational words.
- “These mountains that you are carrying, you were only supposed to climb.”
- “You grow up the day you have your first real laugh – at yourself.” – Ethel Barrymore
- “It takes nothing to join the crowd. It takes everything to stand alone.” – Hans F. Hansen
- “When life brings big winds of change that almost blow you over, close your eyes, hold on tight, and believe.” – Lisa Lieberman-Wang
- “You’re still a rock star.” I whisper to myself as I take my multivitamin and get into bed at 9 pm.”
- “Never stop doing your best just because someone doesn’t give you credit.”
- “I was never really insane except upon occasions when my heart was touched.” – Edgar Allan Poe
- “I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade… And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party.”- Ron White
- “I dream of a better world where a chicken can cross the road without having his motive questioned.”
- “Be brave. Even if you’re not, pretend to be.”
- “When I was 5 years old, my mother always told me that happiness was the key to life. When I went to school, they asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up. I wrote down ‘happy’. They told me I didn’t understand the assignment, and I told them they didn’t understand life.”- John Lennon
- “I figured something out. The future is unpredictable.” – John Green
- “Opportunity is always knocking. The problem is that most people have the self-doubt station in their heads turned up way too loud to hear it.”- Brian Vaszily
- “When you focus on the good, the good gets better.”
- “Just because my path is different doesn’t mean I’m lost.”
- “Be nice to nerds. You may end up working for them. We all could.” – Charles J. Sykes
- “When life shuts a door… open it again. That’s how they work.”
- “I’ll probably never fully become what I wanted to be when I grew up, but that’s probably because I wanted to be a ninja princess.”- Cassandra Duffy
- “I do not advocate violence. I advocate peace. And then just when my opponent believes me, I punch him in the face.” – Buster Guru
- “Never stop learning, because life never stops teaching.”
- “The reason I talk to myself is because I’m the only one whose answers I accept.” – George Carlin
- “You can do anything! Just get up and do it, follow your dreams.”
- “The only time you should ever look back is to check out that booty.”
- “Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.” – Mark Twain
- “To succeed in life, you need three things: a wishbone, a backbone and a funny bone.” – Reba McEntire
- “Wisdom comes from experience. Experience is often a result of lack of wisdom.” – Terry Pratchett
- “May your enemies live long enough so they could witness your success.”
- “If people are doubting how far you can go, go so far that you can’t hear them anymore.” – Michele Ruiz
- “A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort.” – Herm Albright
- “Optimist: someone who figures that taking a step backward after taking a step forward is not a disaster, it’s more like a cha-cha.”- Robert Brault
- “You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself any direction you choose. You’re on your own. And you know what you know. And YOU are the one who’ll decide where to go.”- Dr. Seuss
- “If you are the smartest person in the room, you are in the wrong room.”
- “Do you know what I have noticed? Complete strangers are more inclined to help you succeed than people you actually know.”
- “Think left and think right and think low and think high. Oh, the thinks you can think up if only you try!” – Dr. Seuss
- “Sometimes you just have to pick yourself up and carry on….”
- “When someone says you can’t do it. Do it twice, and take pictures.”
- “Remember, Today is the Tomorrow you worried about Yesterday.”
- “You can laugh off everything, but not with everybody.” – Pierre Desproges
- “I am going to succeed because I am crazy enough to think that I can.”
- “The way I see it, if you want the rainbow, you gotta put up with the rain.” – Dolly Parton
- “A peacock that rests on his tail feathers is just another turkey.”- Dolly Parton
- “Sometimes life knocks you down… get up, get up, get up!!! Happiness is not the absence of problems, it’s the ability to deal with them.”- Steve Maraboli
- “Life doesn’t imitate art, it imitates bad television.” – Woody Allen
- “My mind is like my internet browser. I have 19 tabs open, 3 are frozen, and I have no idea where the music is coming from.”
- “Good, Better, Best. Never let it rest till your good is better and your better is best.”
- “The road to success is always under construction.”
- “If “Plan A” didn’t work. The alphabet has 25 more letters! Stay cool.”
- “Aspire to inspire before we expire.” – Eugene Bell Jr
- “Doing nothing is very hard to do, you never know when you’re finished.”
- “When I’m sad I just sing, and then I realize my voice is worse than my problems.”
Funny Motivational Quotes For Work
These are some of the funniest, witty, sarcastic and some amazing motivational one-liners to push yourself towards your goals.
- “It’s true hard work never killed anybody, but I figure, why take the chance?”– Ronald Reagan
- “It takes less time to do things right than to explain why you did it wrong.” – Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
- “Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.”– Bernard Baruch
- “You cannot be anything if you want to be everything.” – Solomon Schechter
- “The world is full of magical things patiently waiting for our wits to grow sharper.”– Bertrand Russell
- “The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.”– Andy Rooney
- “The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has never tried to contact us.”– Bill Watterson
- “The only time I don’t have any problems in this world is when I am already six feet below the ground.”- James Jason
- “We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.”– Bryan White
- “Watching a person who successfully loses fifty pounds and changes her life is more inspirational than listening to a fitness coach with a perfect body.”- Martin Meadows
- “To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.”– Steven Wright
- “Goal setting is similar to traveling from point A to point B within a city. If you clearly understand what the goal is, you will definitely reach the destination because you know its address.”- Thomas Abreu
- “The key to success is not through achievement but through enthusiasm.” – Malcolm Forbes
- “The minute you settle for less than you deserve, you get even less than you settled for.” – Maureen Dowd
- “A mind is like a parachute. It doesn’t work if it is not open.” – Frank Zappa
- “Every man is guilty of all the good he did not do.” – Voltaire
- “A woman is like a tea bag – you can’t tell how strong she is until you put her in hot water.”– Eleanor Roosevelt
- “We don’t stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing.” – George Bernard Shaw
- “Women are wiser than men because they know less and understand more.”– James Thurber
- “If you’re going to tell people the truth, be funny or they’ll kill you.”– Billy Wilder
- “By the time a man realizes that his father was right, he has a son who thinks he’s wrong.”– Charles Wadsworth
- “Haters are just confused admirers because they can’t figure out the reason why everyone loves you.”– Jeffree Star
- “We are all here on earth to help others; what on earth the others are here for I don’t know.” – W. H. Auden
- “He who laughs last didn’t get the joke.”– Charles de Gaulle
- “It takes considerable knowledge just to realize the extent of your own ignorance.”– Thomas Sowell
- “The cure for boredom is curiosity. There is no cure for curiosity.”– Dorothy Parker
- “If you live to be one hundred, you’ve got it made. Very few people die past that age.”– George Burns
- “I was born to make mistakes, not to fake perfection.”– Drake
- “The brain is a wonderful organ; it starts working the moment you get up in the morning, and does not stop until you get into the office.” – Robert Fros
- “Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.”– Alan Dundes
- “I’m in shape. Round is a shape.”– George Carlin
- “Good advice is something a man gives when he is too old to set a bad example.”– Francois de La Rochefoucauld
- “I know that there are people who do not love their fellow man, and I hate people like that!”– Tom Lehrer
- “I don’t want any yes-men around me. I want everybody to tell me the truth even if it costs them their job.”– Samuel Goldwyn
- “Money won’t buy happiness, but it will pay the salaries of a large research staff to study the problem.”– Bill Vaughan
- “Laughing at our mistakes can lengthen our own life. Laughing at someone else’s can shorten it.”– Cullen Hightower
- “A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don’t need it.”– Bob Hope
- “Life is like the stock market. Some days you’re up. Some days you’re down. And some days you feel like something the bull left behind.”- Paula Wall
- “Education is learning what you didn’t even know you didn’t know.”– Daniel J. Boorstin
- “Leave something for someone but don’t leave someone for something.”– Enid Blyton
- “A day without laughter is a day wasted.”– Charlie Chaplin
- “When you do not know what you are doing and what you are doing is the best that is inspiration.”- Robert Bresson
- “I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older; then it dawned on me – they’re cramming for their final exam.” – George Carlin
- “Things work out best for those who make the best of how things work out.” —John Wooden
- “Have no fear of perfection. You’ll never reach it.”– Salvador Dali
- “Without ambition one starts nothing. Without work, one finishes nothing. The prize will not be sent to you. You have to win it.”- Ralph Waldo Emerson
- “Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won’t expect it back.” – Oscar Wilde
- “A failure is like fertilizer; it stinks to be sure, but it makes things grow faster in the future.”– Denis Waitley
- “Talent hits a target no one else can hit. Genius hits a target no one else can see.”- Arthur Schopenhauer
- “If you’re going to do something tonight that you’ll be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late.”– Henny Youngman
- “Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt.”– Abraham Lincoln
Short Funny Motivational Quotes
Super short but funny quotes to motivate you.
- “It takes sunshine and rain to make a rainbow. There would be no rainbows without sunshine and rain.”- Roy T. Bennett
- “If you hang out with chickens, you’re going to cluck and if you hang out with eagles, you’re going to fly.”- Steve Maraboli
- “Imperfection is beauty, madness is genius and it’s better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring.”- Marilyn Monroe
- “We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.”- Oscar Wilde
- “The elevator to success is out of order. You’ll have to use the stairs… one step at a time.” – Joe Girard
- “Learn the rules like a pro, so you can break them like an artist.”- Pablo Picasso
- “Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.”- Oscar Wilde
- “Trying is the first step toward failure.” – Homer Simpson
- “If you let your head get too big, it’ll break your neck.” – Elvis Presley
- “The only way of discovering the limits of the possible is to venture a little way past them into the impossible.”- Arthur C. Clarke
- “If you’re going through hell, keep going.”- Winston Churchill
- “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.”- Thomas A. Edison
- “Age is of no importance unless you’re a cheese.” – Billie Burke
- “Consider the postage stamp: its usefulness consists in the ability to stick to one thing ’til it gets there.”- Josh Billings
- “First they ignore you, then they ridicule you, then they fight you, and then you win.”- Mahatma Gandhi
- “Women who seek to be equal with men lack ambition.” – Marilyn Monroe
- “Life is a shipwreck but we must not forget tossing in the lifeboats.” – Voltaire
- “The difference between genius and stupidity is; genius has its limits.” – Albert Einstein
- “A few harmless flakes working together can unleash an avalanche of destruction.” – Justin Sewell
- “Live each day like it’s your second to the last. That way you can fall asleep at night.” – Jason Love
- “Change the way you look at things and the things you look at change.”- Wayne W. Dyer
- “The light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off due to budget cuts.”
- “Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.”- Phyllis Diller
- “It is not the answer that enlightens, but the question.” – Eugene Ionesco Decouvertes
- “The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up.” – Mark Twain
- “The man who moves a mountain begins by carrying away small stones.”- Confucius
- “Even a stopped clock is right twice every day. After some years, it can boast of a long series of successes.” – Marie von Ebner-Eschenbach
- “I cannot afford to waste my time making money.” – Louis Agassiz
- “Only he who attempts the absurd is capable of achieving the impossible.”- Miguel de Unamuno
- “The question isn’t who is going to let me, it’s who is going to stop me.” – Ayn Rand